Since I turned 30 6 months ago (in kid language, I guess that makes me 30 and a half!) I've really been thinking a lot about my life - all the areas of my life. I don't know if it was just that particular number that hit me or what, but I came to a new realization that I don't have all the time in the world anymore, not that I ever did. Time is precious. People are precious. And I don't have forever to enjoy them.
I joined a gym in May and have been pretty faithful in attending since then. I am more conscious about my health now than I ever have been. Not just in how I look, but in how healthy I am. I don't want to ever get to a point where my continual excuse for not doing something with my family becomes, "I'm too tired". I want to WANT to go and do as I get older. I like to be on the go now and want to be able to continue that. Oh, I'm a homebody to an extent, but I love being on the go and doing different things, too. I like to travel to different places. I like to experience new things. I like to play in the floor with my daughter. I like to ride roller coasters. I still sometimes like to climb trees. I just don't want to get to a point where my excuse for not doing those things is that I'm too tired or because my lack of activity now has made me physically unable. That would be a disservice to my children and grandchildren.
I also want to pay more attention to the cleanliness of my home. Not that I'm there yet, but I want to be organized, uncluttered, and "together" where my house is concerned. I'm still working on getting going on that one. I am working on not being such a pack rat. Oh, I'm not extreme by any means, but there are things that I hang on to that I think I might use sometime or feel obligated to keep it because someone gave it to me. Doing this FlyLady thing has helped a bunch just to keep on a schedule and know that I don't have to do a major all day clean and bust my behind if I can just do a little at a time here and there all the time, things will actually take care of themselves. Like I said, I'm by no means there yet.
I also want to be a better planner. I want to make sure my family has everything they need when they need it. Like having toilet paper at all times and not running out. Or paper towels. Or clean underwear. Or ironed pants for work. Or enough in the pantry that I can make a meal on the fly or add to whatever I'm making to accommodate a couple of Tanner's buddies who are staying for dinner.
I also want to be more of a prayer warrior. I want to be that person that when those people I know need someone to pray for them, they can ask me and KNOW that I'll be praying. Oh, I do ok now, but I can always do better. I can always pray more. I want to have that closeness with the Lord where it's like a constant communication. I'd love to have more discernment and to be able to know what to say and if/when to say anything if someone needs something.
I want to be a better wife. There have been some issues happen recently that have caused me to take a more in depth look at how a behave as a wife. Do I exemplify what the Bible says a wife should be? I want it not to matter what my husband does in his role (he does great, by the way!), but as much as it's up to me, I want to make ours the best marriage it can be. I want to meet the needs of my husband and be as unselfish as my selfish self can be. I don't want to focus at all on "what's he doing for me", but how can I serve and please my husband. Not because I feel like I'm in a lesser role or that I have to do those things, but because I want to make him happy because I love him, I'm committed to him, and he's my partner for life. And I know that as I do things to make him happy, he's more likely to return the favor, per say. I want to make ours a peaceful home that he can come to at the end of the day and know that his wife is here to welcome him and love him and for him to know he won't be met with tension. I want to make it so that he would not wish to go anywhere else but home to his family because that's the place he loves to be the most.
I've lived 30 years so far and don't feel like I've even come close to mastering any of these things. But I realize now that 30 years are behind me and only God knows how many are in front of me. So, for as long as I have left, I want to be the best I can be, every day, in everything I can do. I guess that means I should get up from my computer and go clean my bathroom. Crud. Not literally, but........ well, you know.